tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post8361297276960595475..comments2024-03-28T14:00:57.504-07:00Comments on Eye on the Edge: Remembering and forgettingDJanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07152183871573797791noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-8021827235784059942017-08-26T11:13:02.629-07:002017-08-26T11:13:02.629-07:00No two people can experience the same thing and re...No two people can experience the same thing and recall or see it the same way. Everyone is different. I think it is normal to remember differently as siblings....for one thing you were the oldest! I think we can only hold so many memories in our brain so we get rid of the mundane and only keep the best and the worst of memories. Just my non scientific thoughts. <br />May your good memories comfort you when you are remembering the not so great times. :)Far Side of Fiftyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07995757632158408442noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-56323115814511297722017-08-23T12:42:59.829-07:002017-08-23T12:42:59.829-07:00Dear DJan, I finally completed the convent memoir ...Dear DJan, I finally completed the convent memoir I began back in 2014. A friend is proofreading it now. when she completes her work, another friend is going to self-publish it for me. As I worked on it, I, like you, wondered at the "truth" of my memory. Some of it I do know goes back to moments that were fraught with emotion and I trust those memories. They are vivid in my mind--not just the picture, but the feeling. And I've told some of those stories for fifty years and they remain the same. (By that I mean that friends hear them again and do not say, "But, Dee, last time you said . . . " Still, what is truth within a life span when memory can mold experience to what we'd like or can mold in the image of a later self. I know only that I cried a lot as I wrote the convent memoir. It brought back my youth and a time when I was so idealistic and romantic in the way I viewed life. It's going to be interesting if any of the women with whom I was in the convent read the memoir. Will our memories be the same? Some will, I'm sure. Others, those that involve great feeling on my part, won't be. Peace.Deehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00612299013780771262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-55245447558296323822017-08-23T09:03:47.167-07:002017-08-23T09:03:47.167-07:00Always fascinating how personal essay writing ofte...Always fascinating how personal essay writing often takes on a life of its own when we explore a topic. Insightful method to learn about ourselves -- and ask more questions. <br /><br />I've often been surprised how my brothers can have stood in a room with me, yet have a completely different retelling of an event. So different are we in our perspective and where we are at certain times of our lives. Interesting also, the few times we recall things the same. The few time. Ha!<br /><br />Fascinating post.Midlife Roadtripperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06700277803842883251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-87308507265504807562017-08-21T12:18:00.055-07:002017-08-21T12:18:00.055-07:00I think the saying goes,"there is nothing mor...I think the saying goes,"there is nothing more unreliable than an eye witness." We are all eyewitnesses to our own lives but often the story we recall becomes blurred by wish, shame, fear, sadness or want. I think I have an accurate memory till I compare events with other eyewitnesses like a family member or friend. Interesting the differences in the narratives. Good Heavens, are we all relying on our own "alternative facts"? Scary. Think I will just trust my version--it is usually one I like:) Arkansas Pattihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14156004753267665579noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-32427568260348811202017-08-21T10:42:53.488-07:002017-08-21T10:42:53.488-07:00We discussed this in my Creative Nonfiction class ...We discussed this in my Creative Nonfiction class in college. I love the term "creative nonfiction" because it so aptly describes telling your own story as you remember it. You will remember events and conversations differently than other people who were right there with you. They have done studies--when some accident or crazy event takes place if fifteen people were there you will get fifteen different versions. None will be identical if you don't let the people talk to each other and influence memories. And--yes--memories can be influenced. <br /><br />Just as reality can be influenced. Tell people a fabrication over and over again and some of them will begin to believe it as fact. We see this right now on the news every day.<br /><br />Then there is time. Memories can shift over time or fade. But we will retain the highly emotional events with much more clarity for a longer time because they are more deeply imprinted. We can only remember what we pay attention to at the time...what really matters the most to us. But they are all yours and yours alone. They are you. :)<br /><br />Ritahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02043285884495492598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-33956298274792529752017-08-20T18:10:49.600-07:002017-08-20T18:10:49.600-07:00I remember, three years ago in a current events gr...I remember, three years ago in a current events group, when I asked where I could read the truth. One person told me to read the Wall Stret Journal and the other recommended Rachel Maddow!<br /><a href="https://manufootballnews.wordpress.com/" rel="nofollow">ผลบอลเมื่อคืน</a>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-22936393866754604322017-08-20T13:26:46.987-07:002017-08-20T13:26:46.987-07:00Absolute and subjective truth is a subject which f...Absolute and subjective truth is a subject which fascinates me. I firmly believe that there ARE some absolute truths, but my own experiences will always have a subjective overlay. Which others may or may not have seen.<br />Have a wonderful love and laughter filled week dear DJan. Elephant's Childhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06650565833097914052noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-49678548761229701312017-08-20T13:13:04.875-07:002017-08-20T13:13:04.875-07:00Memories are funny. I find that even when The Hus...Memories are funny. I find that even when The Husband and I experience something we both recall it very differently. <br /><br />Have a wonderful week, my friend.Gigihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05467164195744234746noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-1701771575061808642017-08-20T11:50:04.462-07:002017-08-20T11:50:04.462-07:00I could have written this post. I have these thoug...I could have written this post. I have these thoughts all the time. when my brother and I get together we remember things differently. You've put these ideas in order so that we can think about them. I enjoyed your p[sot this morning.Redhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17996243850279671523noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-64604093296142599152017-08-20T10:33:30.384-07:002017-08-20T10:33:30.384-07:00Like Tabor, I want there to be absolute truth. And...Like Tabor, I want there to be absolute truth. And I think there is, in that some things are actually spoken, and some actions are in fact taken. Then interpretation sets in, and we all interpret facts based on our own bank of experiences. Do we trust or not trust? Are we prone to be positively or negatively disposed to this person or action?<br />Seeking multiple sources of input gives a broader perspective, but ultimately we decide for ourselves what we BELIEVE to be true.<br /> <br />As for memories, I have written my memoir, or at least 160 pages of what I remember and that seemed important. When I talk with my sister about it, she has many very different memories. And yes, there are some very uncomfortable memories stuck in my amygdala. Linda Reederhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07665601809156707572noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-45298278092721934222017-08-20T09:42:24.642-07:002017-08-20T09:42:24.642-07:00What is truth? I talk about that all the time with...What is truth? I talk about that all the time with my memoir students. They ask, "How do I know what I am writing is the real truth?" <br />I tell them, "You can only write what you remember as truth. You write your truth. You can't write your sister's truth." If we are looking at a box on a table and someone is on the other side of the table, they will see the box differently from the way we see it.<br />Writing memoir helps us bring out memories, and in this kind of writing, we are allowed to reflect on what we remember. That makes it a wonderful way to handle the emotional thoughts that come up. At the beginning of a memoir, I suggest to my students to write "This is my life story as I remember it. Others might have different memories, but I can only write my truth."<br /><br />The police say that three witnesses to a crime or accident will tell three different accounts. We don't all see things the same way. We don't focus on the same happenings.<br />Great post, DJan. Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving your comments.Glenda Beallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17953170428175025248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-8203511389508794632017-08-20T08:55:26.237-07:002017-08-20T08:55:26.237-07:00I remember, three years ago in a current events gr...I remember, three years ago in a current events group, when I asked where I could read the truth. One person told me to read the Wall Stret Journal and the other recommended Rachel Maddow!<br /><br />So it's only been recently that I've come to believe that some truth is relative, all filtered through who we are and where we have been.<br /><br />Some truth is real, though. Like the elderly woman I hugged today while she sobbed in fear at leaving her friends in the refugee camp and moving instead to an apartment. Linda Myershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05706455533282204519noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-17131719516462533492017-08-20T08:42:04.992-07:002017-08-20T08:42:04.992-07:00There are facts. I graduated high school, got a c...There are facts. I graduated high school, got a college bachelor degree, finished a masters degree and 10 years later completed a PhD. I have pieces of paper and pictures documenting those events. My perception and memories of happy events and difficult events in my past are colored by my emotions at that time and effected by my life events. It just seems that there are people who want the facts to be something other than the pictures and pieces of paper that document past and current events. Your Sunday musings are very thoughtful, provoking and non judgmental This journey through the last decades of life are emotional and sometimes just puzzling. Mariannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07707434035585333509noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-65674415277115865842017-08-20T08:27:52.691-07:002017-08-20T08:27:52.691-07:00I totally understand you when you wonder about how...I totally understand you when you wonder about how we fashion our truths after years go by. But I have also come to understand because of our senses and points of reference to our experiences even when two of us are witnessing an event together side by side will have us come up with our biased truth. Each of us will have a selection of different stimuli to call on as we recall what we witnessed. I sometimes wonder if a single truth is even possible. Even in science truths continue to shift as they also,do,in maths. <br />I believe we all are able to share some common ground and we label that to have the value of being true.<br />And we have a human need to be valued. That enables us to join together and try to share some values. <br />Our unique perceptions play a big role. I suppose that is why we have some very odd leaders and followers lately?<br />Shakespeare plays with this thought in his plays and has spectators trying hard to follow along. Wonder how he would have written a Trump play? Drama, comedy or tragedy? Food for thought?<br />Sadly death is always a part of a play as it mirrors life. Is there truth in it?<br />For sure today is Sunday and you have sparked my brain to ponder far beyond what was to be a comment. There is truth in that. I love how you can push my thoughts to anoher level. Have a fantastic week.<br />Heidrun Khokhar, KleinsteMottehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16174142810114806410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-2117167516957248072017-08-20T08:14:19.877-07:002017-08-20T08:14:19.877-07:00It is not comforting to me to think there are no a...It is not comforting to me to think there are no absolute truths. Complex truths, yes, but I like to think there is an absolutism I can lean on.Taborhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15257045780724471840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-3203070705266482322017-08-20T08:13:27.476-07:002017-08-20T08:13:27.476-07:00Some of my earliest memories are etched in my brai...Some of my earliest memories are etched in my brain, though not all of them when I was fearful. I treasure each and every one now, as I look back on my life. I see how they contributed to who I am today and I am OK with that person. I can look at my mistakes now and see them as learning opportunities, though some mistakes I keep making over and over. At least I have an awareness now. I want to stop myself from repeating them as the next part of my growth. Through it all, I am evolving, becoming who I am meant to be. It is exciting, as I get older, to feel I am still growing. <br /><br />Thank you for ispiring the self reflection today, Jan. Have a. Great day and wonderful week.Marie Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03882722634065183364noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-197597102880101691.post-10444797229852946262017-08-20T07:20:29.076-07:002017-08-20T07:20:29.076-07:00DJan, I have to admit that I've always wondere...DJan, I have to admit that I've always wondered about the "absolute truth"... and over the years have come to believe that truth is 'relative' (my truth may not be your truth). Things are never black or white, but mostly shades of gray. They may start out black and white, but always change over time (maybe there's a life lesson here). But trying to make my truth your truth is not the answer. Seems to me we simply have to accept our differences... as long as our differences don't affect others' lives. Is it possible for us to do that? I'm guessing some can and some can't... and that's the dilemma that seems to be unsettling the world. Forgive my simple approach as the state of the world is much more complicated, but this is how my mind works.<br /><br />As far as our memories go, I find that even my 3 children have different memories of the same times together. Each has their own truth... as they perceived it. So whether we can trust what we do 'think' happened in years past, I don't know. But interesting post! Rianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09472421271620543536noreply@blogger.com