Nadir of the year

Random forest path, taken in summer

Here I am again. Sunday morning, nothing much on my mind except the dark, dark days of winter that press on me, and I am dreaming of summer again. I had a very vivid dream last night and woke wishing I could return to it. I was hiking with my friends, and we were going to a place we hadn't been before. Although I was aware that the elevation gain and loss would be a lot of work, we headed downward on the path, only to discover that it led to a high school, which was strategically built onto ledges and the few flat places on the side of the trail. One of the students, a sophomore named Santiago, became our guide through the school, which went on and on forever. At one point we were close to the ocean, and I saw a huge wave build up and up, and then it crashed onto the land. We got wet and I could taste the salt water on my face, but we were in no real danger. The blue of the ocean, vibrant sunlight and colors permeated the dream.

Then I woke up, and I wanted to return to the dream to find my friends and help them navigate through to the other side. There was a bit of the feeling of things spiraling out of control, but Santiago was there, always, to help. Sometimes I wonder about people who are in my dreams that I've never met. He was so real that I can still see his face.

Perhaps the dream was triggered by a movie I saw last night: Youth. When I left the theater, I was struck by the mood of the crowd, which mirrored my own, dazzled and a little unsure of quite what I was feeling. It is a movie about old age and is filled with meditations about love, loss, friendships, and the bizarrely beautiful and gross. It takes place at a luxury spa in the Swedish mountains with two old men, played by Harvey Keitel and Michael Caine, whose friendship forms the core of the movie. I can't say I loved it, but I'm glad I saw it and would see it again, if only to make a little more sense of it all. Many reviewers were reminded of the Fellini movie 8 1/2, which I never saw. Maybe I should. It certainly garnered plenty of awards, and I suspect there will be a few for this one. If nothing else, the cinematography is incredible.

I have been watching the weather website to see how much time the day gains each day. After we reach the winter solstice, when the days are the shortest and the nights the longest, the days begin, almost imperceptibly, to lengthen. At first for a second or two, and today we will gain a full half a minute. It's not until we reach the end of January that I really notice the light in the morning when I walk to the bus. These days I'm walking in the dark, with my trusty headlamp to light the way ahead and make me more visible to vehicles.

Yesterday when I drove to the starting point for the walk with the ladies, I had to drive in the dark but watched the sky turn pink as I arrived. Since we meet at 8:00am, and this particular meeting place is a bit of a drive, I didn't expect many of us to show up. But we did; there were eleven women and one dog for our six-mile walk. It felt really cold and took me awhile to warm up, but I finally did and was happy to be there, outside walking briskly with my friends. It's been six years since I first started walking with them and value the friendship and the exercise. As I've said before, I am definitely a social exerciser. If I didn't have the group, I wouldn't be going.

Which reminds me, for the first time in over a month, our regular aerobics teacher will return tomorrow. Just before Thanksgiving, her mother passed away, and as she was her last remaining relative, it fell to Joanne to take care of the estate. Since her mother lived in Seattle, Joanne traveled there often and probably had to stay overnight as well. I ran into her husband a couple of times and learned that Joanne was having a hard time of it, so it will be really good to see her getting back into her routine. She has taught that same class for over twenty years, three times a week. Our temporary instructors were just fine, but it's not the same without Joanne.

By the time I write in here next week, it will be the year 2016. I am constantly surprised by how quickly the years pass; it seems like I just got used to 2015, and now it's over. We will be more than halfway through the teen years of the new century; how did that happen? I remember the hoopla on the way toward Y2K, and here we are, sixteen years later. In China, the new year will begin on February 8, the year of the Red Fire Monkey. I just looked up my horoscope for the coming year on that link, and it says it will be "Achievement After Hardship." Do you know which animal was named the year you were born? Chinese horoscopes have 12 animals, and I was born during the Year of the Horse. Of course, I don't follow this stuff very often, but there's definitely a superstitious bone or two in my body, so I read it. Humph. I'm not sure how I feel about achievement after hardship. That means I have a trial or two ahead of me.

The older one gets, the more hardships one faces. That's because I am now 73, and as I like to think of it, I'm making my way through the human life cycle one day at a time, and they accumulate as my body begins to wear out. Therefore, my pursuits turn more introspective and my easy chair begins to be a friend I spend more time with. I love to read and ponder and write and... all those things will continue no matter what happens with my physical self. Right now I'm good, even with all the aches and pains of old age.

Which brings me to the end of this Sunday's meanderings. Again I sit here with my tea gone, my hubby almost asleep next to me (I don't hear any snoring so I'm not sure), and my day about to begin. I can feel my consciousness reaching out to my dear readers, thinking of you in all your various daily activities, taking the time to stop for a moment and feel our connection. I hope you had a wonderful Christmas that surrounded you with love. Until next week, then.