I stepped from Plank to Plank
A slow and cautious way
The Stars about my Head I felt
About my feet the Sea.

I knew not but the next
Would be my final inch -
This gave me that precarious Gait
Some call Experience.

Emily Dickinson, c. 1864

Sunday, November 18, 2018

A little help from my friends

Frozen leaves in early morning light
The capricious fall weather has taken us from mild and rainy to cold and clear, seemingly every other day. We have a cold but sunny weekend to be followed by rainy and cloudy before Thanksgiving Day on Thursday. Our Canadian neighbors already celebrated their own official Thanksgiving on the second Monday in October. This year, the holiday in the US will fall on the earliest date possible, the 22nd, the fourth Thursday of the month.

I am not a big fan of holidays that interfere with my daily routine. Every Thanksgiving Day the buses don't run, the Y is closed, and even my favorite coffee shop is closed for the day. And of course we won't go on our usual Thursday hike, either. John and I have made arrangements to meet at the Haggen Grocery in Fairhaven for our usual morning meetup for caffeine. At least the big grocery stores are still open on Thursday, and this one has a coffee shop inside. It gets even harder to find a place on Christmas Day, but fortunately for us we will still have a chance to enjoy some coffee together. This Thursday, I'll go to a benefit yoga class a couple of blocks away, which will be the majority of my exercise for the day, it seems.

The past couple of years I've been having real difficulty keeping up with the regular hikers on our hard uphill hikes, and several of my friends have suggested various remedies. Last week, Tom, one of our regular Trailblazers, brought a box of hydration packets that he swears by. He handed some out to everybody, and he gave me three of them. They are called "Liquid IV" hydration multiplier. They are not cheap, by any means, but if they work, I'll be happy to shell out the money. From reading some of the reviews on Amazon, Tom is not alone in feeling that these electrolyte replacement packets are worth it. Plus, it seems they help with a hangover. Not that I'm likely to drink that much these days, but sometimes it happens at parties that I drink more than usual. I'll keep one with me just in case.

This Thanksgiving, my hubby and I will skip turkey or salmon (our usual fare) entirely, and I'm going to make a big batch of ratatouille, which we can enjoy for days afterwards. I'm thinking of having some side veggies to enjoy, along with some dense bread and cheese spreads. It's just the two of us, but I like to have something special on the day we formally give thanks for all we share. If I were with my family in Texas, I'd be having the usual fare of turkey, dressing, cranberry jelly, and mashed potatoes with gravy. John is going with a friend to a local casino for a huge spread. Gene is in Hawaii, walking along the beach and enjoying the weather and the food.

I will have my final pre-scheduled acupuncture treatment next week, and I'm thinking I might sign up for once a month or so. It seems odd, but I'm really going to miss having needles stuck all over my body. I've learned a great deal about my body's ability to heal itself. The heel problem I originally went for has gotten much better (although it flares up after a long hike, it's way better and returns to normal the next day). I didn't realize that the severe injury I suffered in 2000, when my pelvis was broken in six places and I lost that artery down my right leg, had such long-lasting effects. My right leg is much less strong than the left; Warren (the acupuncturist) has given me daily exercises to strengthen it, and I roll a little ball over my right heel (the one with the problem) and the arch as well. At first it really hurt, but now it's bearable and seems to be helping.

When I got to my yoga class on Friday, a friend who is also a Trailblazer, presented me with a bag of goodies that she thinks will help me. It's another sort of hydration system, developed by Pacific Health Labs, that she thinks really helps her. She gave me a bottle of capsules and hydration drink mixes, and when I compared them with what Tom gave me, there are some differences in ratios, but they are the same basic ingredients. I was really touched that she thought of me, and that she also is hoping to keep me on the trails awhile longer. She made friends with a few of the other hikers and they usually go off on their own (much harder) hikes on Thursdays, but she still occasionally shows up to hike with the larger group.

It seems that most people have less compunction to come every week than I do. That is changing, though, I can feel that I'm coming to another one of those junctures where I need to decide what is more important: staying with a routine or listening to what my body is telling me. With the help of so many friends who are concerned about me, how can I go wrong? It's rather humbling to realize how many people are willing to reach out and offer help.

Yesterday we ladies walked in sunshine and very cold temperatures. Today it's even colder, below freezing, so I'll be scraping the windshield before I take off to the coffee shop to share a bagel with my friend John and drink my favorite latte. And best of all, after yesterday's walk, one of my dear friends who I knew was angry with me, came up to me afterwards and gave me a huge hug. She went off after that, leaving me open-mouthed with tears welling up in my eyes. I have been forgiven and she made sure I knew. A tight feeling I'd been carrying around, without even realizing it, has let go, and I feel so grateful for all my friends who let me know that they care about me.

So now you know why the title of the post is "a little help from my friends." It's because I get by only with the support and love of those around me, from my dear partner right down to the people I chat with in exercise class, whose names often escape me. Right now, this Thanksgiving week, I am incredibly grateful for the many intangible lessons I'm learning about how to be a bonafide good person. The people who surround me are teaching me humility, and that's saying something.

I can only hope that you, my dear readers, will have a week that will give you an opportunity to say thank you to many in your own karass (look it up). It's a week to enjoy the company of our family and friends, whether or not you are in the US. As we move more deeply towards dark days at the end of the year, with long nights and short days, we all have much to be thankful for. Until we meet again next week, I wish you all good things. Be well, dear friends.

15 comments:

Linda Reeder said...

It's hard for me to imagine you making anyone angry. Your karass is large because you reach out to people and attract friends.

We are going to my sister's large family Thanksgiving gathering. It will involve a long drive in heavy traffic, and was not my first choice, but an attempt to have family here at our house fell through. I think my sister was surprised and very pleased when I called her last week and asked her if we could come. Our relationship has been rather strained because of political differences and her social media behavior. I think my call felt like a huge hug to her, and that makes me happy too. We can get past this.

I feel that I am a part of other people's "Karasses" rather than having a large group of my own. That happens when one is an introvert and not very social. That I don't always feel the love is more a reflection of me than them, I guess. I do know that there are people who care about me, and I am grateful for that.

Happy week, Happy Thanksgiving. :-)

Elephant's Child said...

Hugs. As Linda said, your karass is large because of your open and welcoming vibe.

Gigi said...

I, too, find it hard to imagine you making anyone angry. But then, we are all capable of it - either on purpose or accidentally; luckily your friend isn't one to hold a grudge.

We will be having our traditional Thanksgiving with our friends. After last year's fiasco, we learned our lesson!

gigihawaii said...

That hug made you feel good. And that's all that matters.

Red said...

Friends can be of great help if we let them help us. Sometimes egos get in the way.

Far Side of Fifty said...

So you upset someone...and she got over it...:) I do that all the time...even when I do nothing I make people mad...it might be a talent!
I hope you have a wonderful week I know you miss going out to do your normal things on Thanksgiving Day!
So you are being a french cook for Thanksgiving...I am not fond of eggplant, onions or zuchinni ...I know I am a fussy eater.
We are hoping to go to a community Thank meal at a local church...at one you are supposed to bring a side or a dessert...the other just a few $ . We will see how I feel.
Tough day today...missing Chance very much today...I have cried most of the day :(

Rita said...

Leah brought me some Ultima electrolytes powder. Really tasty! Ian calls it electric water. Because it is expensive I haven't been using it much. I probably should. Supposed to help with energy, she said.

I can annoy people without even trying. I'm kind of like a combination of Rose and Sophia on the Golden Girls.

Enjoy your day. Good friends are treasures. You have many! :)

Arkansas Patti said...

Have no idea how you could make anyone angry but it was interesting how the forgiveness made you feel. I have been the forgiver and know how freeing that can be. Was never sure how my forgiveness made the forgiven feel. Great to know this time of year. Have a great Thanksgiving day my friend.

Marie Smith said...

Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves as well as the other.

You have many kind people in your life as you are to them I am sure.

Happy Thanksgiving, Jan. You have much to celebrate this week.

William Kendall said...

Holidays do have that way of screwing up your internal calendar.

John's Island said...

Hi DJan, This is a perfect post for Thanksgiving week. Thank you, as always, for sharing and thank you for your kind comments for me. Happy Thanksgiving to you and Smart Guy. John

Dee said...

Dear DJan, thank you for the new word. You, I think, have become part of my harass. You and the bloggers who have supported me through the thick and thin of my health problems and my publishing ventures. You are all such a blessing in my life. The faith journey that I've traveled through the years that have led to now has taken me from being a Roman Catholic to a fallen-away Catholic to an atheist and now to a person who believes in the Oneness of All Creation. In that Oneness, I wish you well and pray for your deepest desires to be fulfilled in a way that brings you to a deep and abiding contentment. Peace.

Dee said...

Dear DJan, oops! misspelling in line one--I meant to use your word kARASS BUT MY SPELL CHECK CHANGED IT! PEACE.

gcbmountaingirl@gmail.com said...

DJan, your weather description makes me want to curl up in a warm room and read, not go out to meet friends or do anything else. I spent Thanksgiving with family in Atlanta area and will go home soon. I had a great time, but am ready to get back into my routine.
I understand the hug and your feeling. I hate for someone to be angry with me when I am unable to make amends. But it is easy to upset someone even when you don't realize it. Have a great week and continue with the acupuncture. In my new book I tell of how acupuncture save my dogs life way back in the seventies. It is a wonderful treatment. Take care of yourself and be careful in the bad weather.

Galen Pearl said...

Yes, help from friends, from the practical hydration packets to the heart reconnection after forgiveness. And listening to our bodies share their wisdom with us. I have been focusing lately on just the simple lessons that my breath has to teach me. Reminding me with every inhale exhale that everything in this manifested universe is impermanent.