![]() |
You don't say! |
![]() |
This year's front porch garden |
![]() |
You don't say! |
![]() |
This year's front porch garden |
![]() |
Looking up |
The aging process is not gradual or gentle. It rushes up, pushes you over, and runs off laughing. No one should grow old who isn't ready to appear ridiculous. —John Mortimer
Yeah, I know. Now I am old enough to know the truth of this statement, and I intend to get older yet, I am braced for all that comes next. The only real problem I have with my aging process is the gradual loss of my eyesight. I have been experiencing AMD (age-related macular degeneration) and am dealing with a darkness that has appeared in both eyes. Fortunately for me, what is missing in one eye is mostly covered by the same area in my other eye. But it makes for a darkening landscape, since there are really and truly visual holes, and nothing I do will change that fact. Wet MD actually has some ability to be slowed down, but dry, which I have. is not. I take lots of vitamins for my eyes and wear broad-brimmed hats and sunglasses that might slow down the progression, but I see changes from one eye appointment to the next. I've also lost a good bit of depth perception, so sunglasses in dappled sunlight make it even harder to see where I'm going. But I'm optimistic, and my eyes have helped to get me this far.
It's Memorial Day weekend, and here in Bellingham we have the annual Ski to Sea team relay race which, if you're not in it, means lots of disruption throughout the entire town. The race has seven segments, starting at the Mt. Baker Ski Area (with both cross-country and downhill legs) and ending with kayaks pulling into Marine Park in Fairhaven. In past years, I've gone to the finish line (taking a designated bus from downtown) and watched some of the finishers drag their kayaks out of the water. I probably won't do that this year, because with good weather it means it will be packed tight with raucous people, drinking and carousing around. Just not my thing, but I will enjoy reading about it in the local paper tomorrow. Hope it goes without incident and everybody is safe.
I'm thinking about all those in my family who have served in the military, although nobody in my family actually died in a war. My son died while serving, but he died of a heart attack while jogging, more than twenty years ago now. My niece Allison retired from the Army as a Colonel, the highest rank anyone in our family ever reached. Daddy was a Major, and my son was a soldier with a couple stripes. We have, over the years, given plenty of days and years of service to our country. I am grateful.
In re-reading my latest book, I was reminded of the ancient sages of Buddhism, Hinduism, and other Asian cultures. And also curious about the language that many ancient scrolls were written in, Sanskrit. It's a beautiful language, and I love to see it written. Nobody speaks it as their own native language today, but it still exists and is used in many cultures as a sacred language. Many sages wrote scriptures in it that are studied today. Here's a name you probably never heard before: Padmasambhava. In modern Tibetan Buddhism, Padmasambhava is considered to be a Buddha that was foretold by Buddha Shakyamuni. I was fascinated to learn that he made some astounding prophecies, among them foretelling today's world. He lived more than a twelve hundred years ago, and he made this prediction:
When the iron bird flies and the horses run on wheels, the Tibetan people will be scattered like ants across the world, and the Dharma will come to the land of the red men (western countries).
How did he know about airplanes and automobiles? Or about the Chinese invasion of Tibet? It makes me wonder whether the ancient sages were actually clairvoyant and able to see the future so clearly. Many books I've read say that is so, and this gives credibility to that fact. It also makes me wonder whether reincarnation and rebirth is also real; I'm still a skeptic when it comes to that concept. One thing I know for sure: we don't actually know very much about the true nature of reality. Maybe that's one reason why I am so fascinated with quantum physics and Buddhism: it feels like the answers lie in there somewhere. Plus it gives me something to study and fill my mind with; it's a very useful way to pass the time and fills me with wonder.
Life is full and my days pass quickly. Too quickly, mostly, and I'm often totally taken by surprise to look up from my laptop and see it's grown late. Looking up is the theme for me on this Memorial Day in 2023. But for now, as I look over at my dear sweet partner sleeping away, I'm thinking about whether when John picks me up for breakfast in Fairhaven, we'll be disrupted by the festival that will take place later today. Tomorrow should be a quiet day for me, since everything will be closed, and I'll go for a nice walk in the park and afterwards sit down, open my laptop and learn more about Sanskrit and ancient sages.
I am truly blessed to have such a good life, and if it were to end today, it's been a very full ride, all the way to this present moment. I am filled with gratitude for so many different aspects of life to appreciate and enjoy. Hopefully you will also have a wonderful day and will remember to look up. You never know what you might see. Until we meet again next week, dear friends, I wish you all good things. Be well.
![]() |
First rosebud in Cornwall Rose Garden |
Your entire life only happens in this moment. The present moment is life itself. Yet, people live as if the opposite were true and treat the present moment as a stepping stone to the next moment — a means to an end. —Eckhart Tolle
I couldn’t live with myself any longer. And in this a question arose without an answer: who is the ‘I’ that cannot live with the self? What is the self? I felt drawn into a void! I didn’t know at the time that what really happened was the mind-made self, with its heaviness, its problems, that lives between the unsatisfying past and the fearful future, collapsed. It dissolved. The next morning I woke up and everything was so peaceful. The peace was there because there was no self. Just a sense of presence or “beingness,” just observing and watching.
![]() |
A natural Mother's Day bouquet |
![]() |
Daddy, Fran, Mama (and someone in the back) |
Our mothers give us so many gifts. They give us the precious gift of life, of course, but they also leave treasured lessons that can guide us along our journeys even when they are no longer with us. —Maria Shriver
It really doesn't matter how old you are, you will always be a child to your mother. And she will often be someone who gives her advice to her offspring to help them navigate the way to happiness. Mama was a real housewife; she never worked outside of the home except as a volunteer. She spent time with us, although she seldom was without a book or two that she was reading. There were stacks of books beside her bed and in the living room by her chair. I still remember seeing her carrying books home from the library, huge numbers of them, sometimes in boxes. And she read them all. I believe she was one of the most well-read people I've ever known.
We moved a lot when I was young, and Mama was able to turn whatever place we were living into a real home in a very short period of time. I always remember thinking of home with her at its center, wherever we lived. It was hard when she died, because suddenly the world no longer had a place in it that I felt was my home. She was a central figure to my feeling of safety in the world. It was not something I could ever find again, even when I was grown and a mother myself. I suppose this is fairly common among women, but I don't really know for sure. I only have my own memories of my safe haven with Mama at the center.
Today, this post is a love letter to my irreplaceable mother. I believe she knows somehow that I am still thinking of her and remembering her with love and gratitude in my heart. She carried me under her own heart and gave me a loving and safe childhood against all odds. I am who I am today because of her. I wish all mothers and their children could have been so blessed. She personified love, and so on her day, today, I'll try my best to do the same with everyone I meet. It's the least I can do to honor her memory. Happy Mother's Day, Mama!
![]() |
Sweet smell and blooms |
As a teenager living on an Air Force Base with my family, I didn't have the opportunity to shop in a store, but perused a Sears catalog to pick out my new school clothes each year. I saw a lovely shirtwaist dress that came in lilac flowers with green leaves, and I fell in love with it. My mother ordered it for me, along with some other clothes, but that is the one I remember the most. And once it came, I wore it over and over. The look of lilacs and green like in the above picture bring back memories of those days. It was sleeveless and had a small collar, I remember, and a flowing skirt.
Of course, in those days we also wore full skirts with lots of crinoline petticoats so that we swished prettily as we walked, and which allowed the skirts to fan out and give a glimpse of the petticoats underneath as we sat at our school desks. I have memories of spending long hours washing and treating those petticoats with starch so that they would continue to stand up with wear. Ah, those were the days when I actually felt that my world would crumble if everything in my outfit wasn't just perfect every day. How long has it been since I've even worn any dress or skirt? A very, very long time. But back then, I was quite the fashionista.
These days I care so much more about the water resistance of my jackets, most of which are either used for rain or misty cool conditions. Fashion doesn't even fit into my life anymore. What does fit into my life is waking each day feeling that only the weather will make a difference in what I do with my day. After fifteen years of experiencing retirement from the workplace, from the ritual of getting up every weekday morning and heading to the office, I realize that I have learned a new way of living, and I like it a lot! I decide what I will do with each and every day, not some schedule imposed upon me by others. and
I have learned that I do need schedules, they make it easier for me to get what I really want out of each day. That, and having a dear partner who shares a life with me that is not imposed from without, but does what makes him happy while I do what makes me happy. I get a lot more exercise than he does, but his days are filled to the brim. We are both so lucky to have found a partner whose desires for happiness coincide. Yesterday was our wedding anniversary, and we acknowledged it, smiled and hugged, and went on about our day. No need for fancy restaurant food or flowers, just enjoying our togetherness. It's not for everybody, but it is perfect for this duo.
Six decades have passed since those halcyon days long ago when I worried about such things as having the correct clothes for school, or petticoats, or any such frivolous activities. I see the kids on the bus sometimes who are heading to school, and most of them are wearing shorts (even when it's cold) and everyone is dressed differently from everyone else. Not so when I was a teenager; you wore the regulation outfit so that you would not stand out. You didn't want to be teased or pointed out that you are not dressed properly. I think the teenage years are when one feels it the strongest, or at least that is my recollection.
I have been watching a delightful limited series on Netflix based on "Bridgerton" characters, and it has dovetailed perfectly into the whole Coronation of the new King of England (which happened yesterday). Although it's based partly on fact, the series also takes a lot of license with what actually occurred in the lives of King George III and Queen Charlotte in the 1800s. I didn't realize that the King was suffering from a malady that meant he was considered mad. Although the story is embellished and changed from reality, it certainly is fascinating to think of what life was like back then. Every society has its norms, just a wee bit different from what it was like six decades ago for me growing up.
It was pouring in London yesterday during the Coronation, but the streets with filled with those who would not miss the occasion. And it was quite impressive to watch the crowning of King Charles and Queen Camilla. I am reminded of an Emily Dickinson poem that speaks to this time: Springtime in the Northern Hemisphere of our lovely planet, with flowers are sprouting everywhere among the Coronations and the rain.
A little Madness in the Spring
Is wholesome even for the King,
But God be with the Clown –
Who ponders this tremendous scene –
This whole Experiment of Green –
As if it were his own!
If you had the chance to go back in time to another era, where would you go? Sometimes I think it would be lovely to have lived during an earlier century, but then again, it would not be so lovely unless I was a privileged individual. And still I would have to deal with the lack of all the amenities I take for granted: electricity, for one, and modern bathrooms, too. When I consider all of those differences, I think I'll stay right here in the middle of the twenty-first century after all. It's given me so many ways to be grateful for all that I am blessed with, including sitting here in the dark writing on my laptop, communicating with others around our wonderful planet. No, I'll stay here.
In just over an hour from now, my friend John will pick me up and take me in his chariot to breakfast, one that would have been sumptuous in any era, and then later I will join my friend Lily to play in a bowling alley with her. I'm not good at it, but I do enjoy being with friends and trying to stay out of the gutter. I do hope you will have a great Sunday, and that you will remember to look around at all the trappings we have, those of us living today in what once would have been unimaginable luxury. Until we meet again next week, dear friends, I wish you all good things. Be well.
![]() |
Lilac buds a day or two away |
Melanie is still in California, so yesterday I decided to do one of our favorite walks by myself: the trail from the Farmers' Market to Fairhaven. I could have gone with my old Saturday walking group, but they start an hour earlier and now I've grown quite happy to start later and then visit the Market, which is just what I did yesterday morning. And after the walk, I treated myself to one of those fabulous scones from The Scone Lady. I will always get the Bourbon Maple Pecan, if they have it. Otherwise, I get a Marionberry scone, which is pretty darn fabulous.
On Friday I got my second bivalent booster dose for Covid. I was surprised that I didn't even feel the shot and wondered if I had actually gotten it. But no, by the time I went to bed, my arm was sore, and it's still quite warm to the touch. I slept just fine, but I did seem a little draggy on my walk. There's no way to know what is responsible for what. Maybe I'm still recovering from Thursday's eight-mile excursion. I am feeling quite happy that my knees and other well-used joints cooperated and I didn't have to pull out any of the many knee braces I hauled along. But being older does mean it takes longer to recuperate from strenuous activities.
And that is all I will say about my age. My sister has reminded me that I am constantly bringing it up and making a big deal about it. Everybody gets a little bit older every day, and I think it might be time for me to look up from my navel and take a look around me, enjoy my continued abilities and look for the bright side of life. After all, I do get to choose what I focus on, and there are so many reasons to be happy these days.
That is, if I stay away from the news of the day. It does seem like every time I turn around, there is another crisis happening, either in the nation or beyond. I am fortunate to be living in such a beautiful part of the country, and to have such incredible access to learn what is going on, but if I allow myself to dwell on the awful events, I will not be able to keep my head in a good place. And there is really no reason to wallow in it, right? Someone like me who doesn't have a job to go to any more, and gets to shape her days to her liking, well that means I can look around at the gorgeous springtime burgeoning everywhere, and look forward to the happy days ahead.
A cool front moved in overnight, and our temperature should be a few degrees cooler today, with the chance of a few sprinkles, but otherwise perfect. I went shopping with my friend Lily and bought myself a new sun hat. It's lightweight and has a little flap that covers my neck. It's a new brand for me, Sunday Afternoons, and I am so happy I found it! Although I like my favorite baseball cap, it doesn't keep the wind out, or cover my neck. This one does both, and it's very comfortable too. I have found that my hearing aids just don't like the wind and the whistling that starts in my ears when I'm out in it is unfortunate. So now I have taken care of that little annoyance.
I really need to learn how to use my cellphone camera better. It keeps jumping into a different mode when I don't mean it to, and I sometimes don't know how to fix it. On my hike on Thursday with Group 2 of the Senior Trailblazers, one of the women took lots of pictures and also some videos. She sent one around in just a few hours after we finished, and I've watched it several times already. I could do that, too, if I could just figure it out. Maybe I'll watch a tutorial on how to do all that stuff, and I can then share them with you. Technology just keeps on improving, but it means that if I want to take advantage of it, I need to put my mind into the mode of learning something new.
There are really two kinds of optimism. There's the complacent, Pollyanna optimism that says, 'Don't worry – everything will be just fine,' and that allows one to just lay back and do nothing about the problems around you. Then there's what we call dynamic optimism. That's an optimism based on action. —Ramez Naam
Hey, that's what I want: to learn how to be dynamically optimistic. It's something I can easily do, since I have a good mind for study, and plenty of options for action. All I need to do is get going, and keep on searching for the correct action for the moment I'm in. Right? It seems so easy when I put it like that, so here goes. At this very moment, I'm creating a post to send out to my dear virtual friends, one that I hope will lift some spirits, including my own. It is springtime, all my body parts work pretty well and don't give me too much grief, and even if my possibilities are not limitless, they are abundant. Here I go! Don't try to hold me back!
And with that cheerful thought, I will bring this post to a close. My dear partner still sleeps next to me, John will be picking me up for our usual Sunday morning breakfast (he's still got a little cough but otherwise is just fine), and the day beckons, with me happily bounding out of my bed and starting my Sunday. I won't forget my new hat, with just the right name for the day. Until we meet again next we, dear friends, I wish you all good things. Be well.
![]() |
Endless rows of tulips |
Not what we have but what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance. —Epicurus
And while all this joy is happening around me, I am also thrilled to have finally become the proud owner of hearing aids. I look forward to putting them on again each morning, which I do while waiting for the water to boil for tea, knowing that I will hear the kettle as it begins its journey towards a whistle. I love my bionic ears! And the cacophony of birdsong I hear every morning is simply enough to bring me great joy. I know the song of perhaps a dozen different birds, but every once in awhile I hear a new one and wonder what it might be. What magnificent beings that can sing like that!
Ah, yes. What a difference perception can make. I now no longer feel that sense of fear, but instead look forward to my friend John coming to transport me to breakfast in a short while. He was down with a cold for four or five days, but he's back now. I missed him but managed quite well without his presence. I did feel a little lonely in the coffee shop, but he's back now and everything feels right again. I do hope you, my dear virtual family, will have a wonderful week ahead, and that you will also find out how to look on the bright side of life. We do have a choice here. Until we meet again next week, I wish you all good things, and that you will have abundant joy every moment of every day. Be well.