First Sunday in May

Happy little sign

I've found a nice walk in my neighborhood that takes me down several streets I haven't visited much before. I saw this delightful little sign. Those last two lines, which are difficult to read, say "Save Farms – Build in Cities," and "Transit Access is Terrific." Their home is on a relatively busy street and has two city buses that come by often. The walk gives me just under 10,000 steps and has the advantage of being a loop, so I can see plenty of variety.

I didn't walk yesterday, not much anyway. Although it wasn't raining hard early, it was definitely damp. And then it got much more so, with almost a half-inch of rain total during the day. Today is supposed to be much the same, only cooler. So yesterday I didn't walk, but today if it's not pouring, I'll try to get out for a little exercise. Having walked three days in a row, I realize how much better I feel for it. My body is not used to all this inactivity, it seems.

Our governor has extended the stay-at-home order until the end of May, but he's allowing some construction projects to begin, and he will open up the state recreational areas tomorrow. Golf courses will open as well, but as with all other recreation activities, you are supposed to keep your golf partners (or hiking partners) limited to two. And we are all encouraged to wear a mask when outdoors in places where social distancing guidelines cannot be followed. 

It seems unlikely that we will be getting back to normal here in Washington State before the end of June, meaning coffee shops and restaurants providing inside seating. I saw a program yesterday that said restaurants will not survive without at least half of their capacity being available. I really feel for all those people who are suffering so badly by not being able to work and not receiving unemployment compensation. There are definitely advantages to being retired and living on Social Security and pensions. I was worried that our annuities would be hit hard, but we are losing less than I feared, meaning we will survive this pandemic in relatively good shape, while so many others are suffering badly.

My worst problem is coming from my inability to keep the pounds from piling on. I've gained around five pounds in two months, and every time I think I'll now be inspired to lose the weight, my resolve fades by late afternoon. Eating good food is so satisfying! Yesterday I selected a pair of pants to wear that have always needed a belt, but no longer. They stay up just fine. Until now, I've managed to keep off the extra fifteen pounds that I lost a decade ago. Every morning I step on the scales, hoping to see that I haven't gained any more. It does help me make better dining decisions during the day, remembering that number.

Sometimes I wonder why I bother, why it matters at all. I am otherwise healthy and relatively fit (not as fit as a month ago), and then I remember what a difference it makes on my knees, not having to carry around extra weight. Five pounds of extra load on my knees is multiplied by four when walking uphill. Since I haven't been exercising much, they feel pretty good. But twenty years ago I had a bad accident that caused me to lose an artery down my right leg and must keep exercising to maintain collateral circulation. The damage to my right side is the reason I should keep going as long as I can, and should keep my weight down as well. I am giving myself a pep talk here, just in case you didn't recognize what I'm doing.

I'm stuck here. What else to write about? I went over to a page of quotes looking for inspiration, but nothing is hitting that writing spot. I'm experiencing a real block! More information about my obsessions is not going to do it. What if I just point my mouse at the page and pick a quote, no matter whether it's good or not? Here goes:

If I get stuck, I look at a book that tells me how someone else did it. I turn the pages, and then I say, 'Oh, I forgot that bit,' then close the book and carry on. Finally, after you've figured out how to do it, you read how they did it and find out how dumb your solution is and how much more clever and efficient theirs is!—Richard P. Feynman

No, I didn't choose this one, it chose me. And the fact that it's about being stuck, well I find that fascinating. It reminds me that synchronicities really do occur, and that I will get the guidance I need by just opening myself up to random chance. If there is such a thing anyway, since this one came to me that way. I do believe in a universe that surrounds me with infinite possibilities. So there you go.

It is just enough for me to consider this post finished. Now it's time to climb out of bed and begin the rest of my day. Maybe it won't rain all day and I can get outdoors and get myself moving. Maybe I'll vegetate in my favorite chair and watch a movie. Or maybe I'll just put one foot in front of the other and see where I end up. Next week will be different, and hopefully I won't be moaning about anything but instead filled with love and joy. There is so much to be grateful for, and there's no need to bemoan my fate. You, I hope, will be in a better place that the one I started out in. And I hope that the coming week will bring you light and happiness. I wish that for myself, too. Until we meet again next week, be well and stay safe.