Gusty winds and old age

Start of Jingle Bell run/walk 12/14

After my usual time at the coffee shop, my friend Steve and I began a tentative walk yesterday morning, with the wind raging around us, but little to no precipitation. At first, it seemed like it would be okay to just walk to the boulevard, but the wind really scared me, since it was either not blowing at all, or lightly, and then a huge gust would come roaring down the street and almost blow me over. I didn't find it to be a comfortable walk at all, so we decided instead to head to a restaurant and have breakfast, a more leisurely way to enjoy the morning. That was very nice, indeed.

We saw the beginning of the 40th anniversary of the Jingle Bell run/walk in front of Bellingham High School. There were plenty of people dressed in festive gear, lots of people with their dogs (since they were encouraged to join in), strollers with babies, and just plain folks going out to have some fun. The event is sponsored by the Arthritis Foundation and includes a 5K untimed walk, a 1-mile run, a Dog Trot, and a special kids-only mile-long run. It looked like everybody was having a good time, and they didn't seem to mind the wind gusts as much as I did. For somebody who jumped out of airplanes and loved to ride the wind, this old lady, these days, has lost her desire for that kind of excitement. 

I came to the conclusion last week that, once you enter your ninth decade of life, when you hit eighty, things begin to change in many ways. I thought about how I am now deep into retirement and would not be considered for any kind of paying job. Who would hire me now? I don't know why it occurred to me all of a sudden like that, but it did. And I am definitely slowing down. I started volunteering at the Senior Center on Thursdays, which used to be my hiking day. Although there are some hikes I would like to do again, I am now limited by the elevation and length of certain ones. And I've done them all many, many times. Tuesday's shorter and less difficult hikes suit me perfectly. Plus I am also going to new places, some in Canada, and I am enjoying them very much. The people I hike with are mostly the same ones, unless they are significantly younger than me. I can allow myself to find new ways to get exercise. 

I feel very fortunate to still be as active as I am as a super-old senior. Once I looked up the stages of elder life on line, and found this:

The United States' older adult population can thus be divided into three life-stage subgroups: the young-old (approximately 65 to 74 years old), the middle-old (ages 75 to 84 years old), and the old-old (over age 85).

My friend John will soon enter the old-old category, and I asked him where he thought he might be in five years, and he said, "Dead." He takes many prescriptions daily, and is barely ambulatory. Although it takes him awhile to get going, he still does what he can. I take him as a cautionary tale about whether to keep on exercising and walking and working out as I have done for decades. But there is no doubt that I have entered that final stage of life. My senses are diminished, especially my ability to see clearly, and I know that is a progressive situation that cannot at this time be avoided. Maybe one day there will be a more suitable treatment for geographic atrophy, but for now I am taking those awful eye injections and will continue for as long as I have central vision in my left eye. The right eye's central vision is already gone, although I still have my peripheral vision in that eye. I can still navigate quite well with the one eye, and that is the reason I can still write these posts. I live with the dread of what my life will be like when I lose it. The treatment is only to slow down the progression, not fix it, so I know what's ahead.

But eyesight is just part of what one loses as you age. Sometimes I get really discouraged and wonder why this particular phase of life can be so long. I don't see any reason to justify old age, except here I am and all I did was continue to breathe, one day, one breath at a time. I got middle-old while I wasn't paying attention. And I see all stages of elder life at the Senior Center and realize I am very much one of the lucky ones because I can still stride forth with vigor, stretch and reach in my yoga classes, and will carry on for as long as possible. What else can I, or anyone, do?

Old age, believe me, is a good and pleasant thing. It is true you are gently shouldered off the stage, but then you are given such a comfortable front stall as spectator. —Confucius

Of course, Confucius died at 73 in 479 BC, but during his life he established a school of moral teachings that continues to this day. You can learn about him on his Wikipedia page here. By the way, I am one of the few people who continues to give money to the people who created Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that I visit almost every day. If you want to help them out, please consider giving to this important organization. Whatever you do, it would be wonderful if you would find a few causes that you find useful and help with whatever you can afford. I don't give much, but there are a few organizations that I think are worth my time and money. Wikipedia is one of them. That's my pitch for the holiday season, friends. Now back to my regularly scheduled post.

I never know for sure where these posts will go, since I sit down with little to no idea of whether anything will emerge from the depths of my mind, but something always does. I know that my posts are sometimes unfocused (like me) and sometimes spot on (like I sometimes am), but I will continue with this endeavor for as long as I can. One day you will come here and find that I didn't post anything, and you will know that for whatever reason, this activity has come to a close. Everything changes, life moves on, and as Confucius says, we are "gently shouldered off the stage" and inevitably turn over the future to the young ones.

For the moment, all continues as usual. My dear friend John will come for me in his truck and we'll go out for breakfast. My sweet guy will be up by then and start his day, but for now he sleeps quietly next to me. Our adventure together will continue, for now. And this holiday season will become a memory, hopefully a good one for us all. I am feeling better since I sat down to write here, which is why I do it, and hopefully you will find some words of wisdom in here. You can't go wrong with Confucius. 

Until we meet again, dear friends, I wish you all good things, and a very happy holiday season. Be well.